| The Greatest Story Ever Told About The Greatest Man That Ever Lived |
| How To Save Your Marriage |
There are far too many divorces happening in our world. And divorce hurts. Especially when there
are children involved and most of the time there are. Is it really necessary? Is life really so bad
that couples have to divorce? Sometimes that is true, and divorce may be a better solution, but in
most cases I don’t think so. Let’s look at a few things.
Usually when couples are on the brink of getting a divorce they are very hurt, angry, and
sometimes even hostile toward each other. It has been said that when people see red, lawyers
see green, but that’s another story. But the surprising thing is that no one ever starts out that way.
In fact if they were to look back at their wedding pictures, they looked so much in love, so happy,
and they showed it toward each other. What happened? Let me offer one possible explanation. I
call it the 90/10 reversal.
When you first get married, you think that you will be this happy for the rest of your life. Nothing
could possible go wrong. Everything is perfect. You love 90% of everything about your spouse.
The other 10% well, it’s no big deal. But as time goes by and you learn more about each other, you
find that some of that 10% begins to bug you. Like how come they can’t hang up their clothes? Or
do they really have to watch so much TV?
You try to discuss it with them but to no avail. In fact the more you try to talk about it, the more
anger surfaces and bad things are said. And still some of these things keep bugging you. Why can’
t they just change? Don’t they see what they are doing? You go on and on like this and all these
little things, the 10%, bugs you more and more until…..
YOU FORGET ALL ABOUT THE 90% THAT YOU LOVED ABOUT YOUR SPOUSE
AND ONLY FOCUS ON THE 10% THAT YOU DON’T LIKE ABOUT THEM.
What you end up doing is turning the 90% into the 10% and the 10% into the 90% until they are
90% bad and only 10% good. And that’s when you decide it’s hopeless and decide to get a divorce.
And then you meet someone else that you like 90% about and start the whole process all over
again.
The fact is this: We are ALL imperfect. We ALL have our faults. And we ALL have many many
good things as well. It’s ALL a matter of which you want to focus on.
are children involved and most of the time there are. Is it really necessary? Is life really so bad
that couples have to divorce? Sometimes that is true, and divorce may be a better solution, but in
most cases I don’t think so. Let’s look at a few things.
Usually when couples are on the brink of getting a divorce they are very hurt, angry, and
sometimes even hostile toward each other. It has been said that when people see red, lawyers
see green, but that’s another story. But the surprising thing is that no one ever starts out that way.
In fact if they were to look back at their wedding pictures, they looked so much in love, so happy,
and they showed it toward each other. What happened? Let me offer one possible explanation. I
call it the 90/10 reversal.
When you first get married, you think that you will be this happy for the rest of your life. Nothing
could possible go wrong. Everything is perfect. You love 90% of everything about your spouse.
The other 10% well, it’s no big deal. But as time goes by and you learn more about each other, you
find that some of that 10% begins to bug you. Like how come they can’t hang up their clothes? Or
do they really have to watch so much TV?
You try to discuss it with them but to no avail. In fact the more you try to talk about it, the more
anger surfaces and bad things are said. And still some of these things keep bugging you. Why can’
t they just change? Don’t they see what they are doing? You go on and on like this and all these
little things, the 10%, bugs you more and more until…..
YOU FORGET ALL ABOUT THE 90% THAT YOU LOVED ABOUT YOUR SPOUSE
AND ONLY FOCUS ON THE 10% THAT YOU DON’T LIKE ABOUT THEM.
What you end up doing is turning the 90% into the 10% and the 10% into the 90% until they are
90% bad and only 10% good. And that’s when you decide it’s hopeless and decide to get a divorce.
And then you meet someone else that you like 90% about and start the whole process all over
again.
The fact is this: We are ALL imperfect. We ALL have our faults. And we ALL have many many
good things as well. It’s ALL a matter of which you want to focus on.